My Stroke, and My Perception of Pain

After my experience of Neural Depolarization some previously inactive muscles were in a lot of pain. The renewed nerve impulses had stimulated the muscles so I could have greater range in my exercising. It has occurred to me lately that I now think differently about pain. In my early childhood I felt a lot of pain due to illnesses. I felt then that pain equated with punishment which I thought of as not necessary, unwanted, and I rebelled. The perception then was "life was painful"! It was not until the occurrence of the stroke two years ago (2000) that my attitude about pain equated with disability and inability and old age or demise, if you will. The nurse/medical perception.

Now, after the joy of being able to move about and exercise despite muscle pain, I finally begin to understand that pain does have its purpose in life. It was My soul and spirit message for me to understand the value of this type of pain which was needed to wake me up internally from my complacency and to change my patterns of choice to respect, honor and value my physical vehicle. Pain was not being done to me as I perceived as a child. It was an internal experience I am choosing to further the growth of my internal cellular consciousness and now I understand it has served its purpose. My spirit senses are there to support me in my growth.

This is a different type pain I experience now. I perceive it as minor discomfort and choose to keep fit as my responsibility and my choice of how I want to live.

Joyce Ann Wilson, R.N.